Posted by
John Crutchfield on Thursday, December 11, 2008 8:30:30 AM
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
not a creature was stirring, not even a louse.
The wallets were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that taxpayers soon would be there.
Fannie and Freddie, were snug in their beds
while visions of bailouts danced in their heads.
Frank and Dodd, a fine pair of crooks,
rewarded their cronies for cooking the books.
When on the TV, news broke with a flash;
I sprang from my couch to count up my cash.
Away to the desk I ran with my cup
tore open our statement and promptly threw up.
Our nest egg had crashed along with the market;
a lifetime of work and no safe place to park it.
When what to my horrified eyes did appear,
but a legion of Marxist engineers.
With an articulate leader, born for this drama,
I knew in a instant it must be Obama.
More patient than vultures his armies they came
to feast on our carcas, he called them by name.
"On Harry, on Nancy, Kucinich and Schumer,
confiscate wealth from those greedy consumers!"
From the streets of Wasilla, to the National Mall;
"Now tax away, tax away, tax away all!"
Like vile opportunists on the wild market ride,
their agenda with sneaky intentions they hide.
All through our freedoms they trampled about
and coerced from the people our right to speak out.
And then in a moment I heard on the stoop
the scuffling crunch of each heavy boot.
As I drew a tense breath and was turning around,
Barack and his storm troopers smashed the door down.
He was dressed in Brioni from his head to his feet,
looking ever so sharp like the liberal elite.
A bundle of dough he had flung on his back
for the poor CEOs and political hacks.
His eyes were determined, his stare was so cold,
audacity, yes, his manner too bold.
His chastising mouth was bent in a frown
as he went on to tear our dear country down.
The butt of a Camel held tight in his fist
as he checked once again the names on his list.
With cunning he'd carefully planned this assault;
"Don't blame me", he said, "its all Bush's fault".
He was lanky and cut, a right fit human being,
but his luster diminished with what I was seeing.
A vengeful eye and a shake of his head
soon gave me to know I had plenty to dread.
He spoke lots of words as he went straight to work
and filled all the wallets with money and perks.
The plan was conceived that we hard working stiffs
would pick up the tab for these onerous gifts.
My pockets they emptied, my cupboards left bare,
they then searched my sofa for change hidden there.
To the convoy he went, with his thugs all in tow,
brushing their tracks from the new fallen snow.
And then he took off for some deliberations
to surrender our land to the United Nations.
But I heard him exclaim as they drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, from the good Reverend Wright!"